So — You scored a second date, huh? Congrats! In this day and age, it can feel just about impossible to land a first date, let alone a second. This is cause for celebration. Clearly, your date liked you enough the first time around to see you again. Now it’s time to come up with some awesome second date ideas.

While first dates are extremely important since you’re making a first impression, second dates can be even more nerve-wracking because you’re more invested in seeing where things can go from here.

If you’re really starting to get excited about this new person, it’s important to follow these dating tips so you can have the best second date out there. After all, the beginning stages of a relationship are the most critical when it comes to forming a once-in-a-lifetime connection.

Ready to form a true romance? To find out what to do on a second date, read on, and you just might find precisely what you’re looking for.

Focus on the connection rather than making an impression

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One of the biggest hurdles of the first handful of dates is that people try so hard to impress their romantic interest that they neglect what they’re truly there for: to form a connection.

In an attempt to impress our person of interest, we may boast about ourselves or show off so we can get them to like us. But the sad truth is that no one’s gonna fall in love with you because you have a Master’s degree in Science or because you have 45 house plants in your kitchen. People fall in love based on factors like chemistry, affection, and connection, moreso than a laundry list of your achievements.

So rather than going on and on to your date about how you won the spelling bee in the twelfth grade, work on building a bond with that person as opposed to chucking your resume details over candlelight. There’s nothing more unromantic than treating your date like they’re on a job interview.

Which leads us to our second tip…

Ignore the dreaded “Daterview” at all costs

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What is a “Daterview,” you ask? According to DateSpot’s glossary this Gen-Z term is “a date that feels less butterfly-inducing and more like you should have brought your résumé. You’re barraged with a line of questions about school, work, family, where you grew up, etc.”

Can you imagine if Romeo and Juliet sat across the table from each other while droning on and on about the pedestrian details of their everyday life? A whole lot less drama would unfold, that’s for sure. Star-Crossed Lovers? More like lukewarm acquaintances who never text each other back.

The last thing you want to do is treat your “romantic outing” as if you’re on a quest to “hire the right candidate” for “future partner.” Don’t pelt your poor date with a bunch of meaningless questions just so you can assess whether or not they check all your boxes.

Now, this doesn’t mean that you can’t ask your date any questions. Of course you can! Just try to add a bit of excitement to the conversation by perhaps asking them things that they’ve never been asked before.

One question I commonly ask my dates is, “If you were a unicorn, what color would your tail be?” Although it sounds silly, it’s a great way to set the tone of playfulness to the scene, so you can relax your shoulders a bit and have some fun!

Ditch the sit-down date — opt for something active

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Dating expert Esther Perel is a huge advocate of going on walks for dates. That way, instead of just staring at one another from across a dinner table while struggling to muster up conversation topics, you can discuss your surroundings. This takes off a lot of the pressure you might find from being in an enclosed space while staring into a near stranger’s eyes.

Other “on the move” options include bike rides, swimming, tennis, bowling, or dancing. Nothing better than bonding while getting your endorphins up!

Consider other activities that are on-the-move, that don’t require you to break a sweat. Strolling through a museum is a terrific way to discuss art and history, while seamlessly wrapping in your own personal stories that the museum inspires. On a personal note, some of the greatest dates I’ve ever been on were in museums. There’s never a dull moment when you’re walking through thrilling hallways, surrounded by art.

Looking for something real? Burn your checklist

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Although there’s nothing wrong with having a dating checklist, some of the most beautiful relationships happen naturally when people drop the preconceived rules and regulations they’ve set for their future partners.

If you’ve always envisioned yourself with a tall guy, yet the guy you’re seeing doesn’t make the cut, don’t be that person who misses out on a great connection simply because the dude doesn’t meet your cookie-cutter requirements.

If you have certain standards, fine. We’re all human. It’s okay if you’re not attracted to certain qualities or have a strict set of deal-breakers. But true chemistry-affection-connection rarely comes from the good-on-paper person. (Watch any rom-com ever made and you’ll see this to be true.)

Don’t neglect the art of flirtation

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This is a simple tip, but it’s seminal. You’re on a date, so act like it. To master the art of flirtation, just be genuine. So if you truly love how your date looks in their button-down, don’t be shy — tell ‘em!

Of course, it’s important to move at your own pace here. But don’t forget the value of creating chemistry or that spark that you’ve been longing for all this time. You’re not out with a buddy, you’re out with a date. So go ahead and have fun with it! That way, there’s no confusion about how you feel about them. But no need to overdo it. The key element is to be genuine.

Be an empathetic listener

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I’ll never forget falling head over heels for this guy who was an absolutely terrible conversationalist. Instead of listening to what I had to say, he responded with listless, one-word answers that killed the conversation.

At a certain point, I confronted him by asking if he’d seen the movie The Breakfast Club. He responded dryly, “no.”

Now, if that were a one-time occasion, I’d let it go. But since he typically responded with “Yes.” “No.” “Cool.” Or “nice.” rather than being genuinely curious about the topics I brought up, I was constantly meeting dead-ends. He’d hear the words coming out of my mouth, but he rarely listened. I felt like I was having endless circular conversations with myself.

I then politely explained the art of empathic listening — which involves listening to your special someone with empathy and understanding, while trying to see things from their perspective. This active listening technique requires being fully present and attentive to what the other person is saying, both verbally and non-verbally. The goal is to understand the meaning and intentions behind what the person is saying, not just the words themselves.

A few other tips: maintain eye contact, process their words, and occasionally paraphrase their statements aloud. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking about what you’re gonna say before they even finish their sentence.

Listening empathically entails making an emotional connection with the other person and finding similarities between their experience and your own so you can give a more heartfelt response. This helps the person you’re talking to feel seen and valued.

Chances are you’re not gonna find everything your date says insanely fascinating, but there’s value in making them feel like they’re being heard. It’s also a fantastic way to form trust within the dynamic.

Now that you know what to do on your second date, you’re more than ready. So put on your favorite red lipstick, and your best dress, and go have fun!